2024 WCD Showcase: Remembering Frank

"Remembering Frank"

Ms. Jacqueline Cavallaro

Most Holy Redeemer, Old Bridge-Matawan, NJ

My dad was born in 1954 – before the moon landing, the cell phone, and the Internet. He grew up in Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn, playing outside with friends and family. When he studied in school, he learned from books, not computers or tablets. When my father became a doctor, he worked with paper charts and had face-to-face interactions with patients. Throughout his life, the world changed so much, but my dad remained committed to doing things the old-fashioned way. He was a brilliant man, but never had much interest in using the computer, let alone artificial intelligence. He preferred to rely on his pencil and paper, books, and memory. He also loved being with people, often striking up a conversation while running errands, going to the bank, and shopping. To him, the Internet could never replace a more personal connection.  

My husband and I grew up in a different time. We used the computer to help with our schoolwork, played video games, and talked to our classmates online. My husband, a tech wiz, loves the convenience that modern technology provides. When my father would come visit, he was unaccustomed to some of our habits: using Alexa to set reminders, constantly texting each other, and reading Yelp reviews for different stores. When my husband and I had a baby, we indulged in buying new gadgets – a toy sheep that detects crying, a sock that monitors the baby’s heart rate, and an app to track feedings. We read parenting blogs and watched YouTube videos to get tips on bathing and burping our daughter. Of course, this was all foreign to my dad, who raised me before these apps, toys, and blogs existed. In fact, my dad used to tell me how much he loved when I was a baby and slept soundly on his chest at night – no monitor, app, or even bassinet required. 

This year, when my daughter was just two months old, my dad passed away. When I think about my dad and my daughter, I know that they will live such different lives. Just as my childhood was different from my father’s, I can only imagine the world in which my child will grow, and the technological advances that will happen during her lifetime. Whereas my husband and I spoke to each other over the computer, my daughter may one day have in-depth conversations with a computer itself! However, as much as the world will change, I know that the love I feel for my daughter – a parent’s love for a child – has always been the same. It is the same love that my grandmother felt for my father, that my father felt for me and my sisters, and that my daughter will one day feel for her baby. When I think about my father, I will always remember the love he had for me, which I hope to pass on to my daughter. Regardless of what happens in the world around us, and how we communicate with one another, this love will endure.